Shopping List

It wasn’t until I’d sat down in the car that I realised why the woman at the store had been avoiding eye contact like the plague.

These were the products I purchased:

liquid skin
massage oil
flavoured K-Y
candles
6 250-mL bottles of water
handheld vibrating ‘massager’
bandaids
A5-35 Hot Patches
Tiger Balm (white hot)
Hard Wax Home Brazilian kit
Epsom Salts
Dark Chocolate
cigarettes*

Note: I was at the drugstore, not the sex store.

*And the best part was, not all of this was for me!


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9 responses to “Shopping List”

  1. Cori Avatar
    Cori

    … I was about to ask.

  2. cenobyte Avatar
    cenobyte

    It’s probably best not to. The woman at the check-out was very snarky. She’s probably sexually repressed.

  3. cenobyte Avatar
    cenobyte

    I’m having some…difficulty…with the words “Big Troy” and “Brazilian Wax” in such close proximity…(love you, man)

  4. Charlie Horse Whisperer Avatar
    Charlie Horse Whisperer

    I knew you’d given up the evil cigarettes.WV = favers

  5. Viper Pilot Avatar
    Viper Pilot

    * It was for… Big Troy?

  6. cenobyte Avatar
    cenobyte

    Oh.And gargle. I also bought mouthwash/gargle. Antiseptic.

  7. Silent Winged Coyote Avatar
    Silent Winged Coyote

    A guy came into my store and bought a hacksaw, a hatchet, 200 feet of rope, and a tarp. I looked him in the eye and said ‘You’re not going to end up on the news using this stuff will you?’ He laughed, ‘I’m pulling down a tree and stripping it down.’Hilarious.

  8. Anonymous Avatar
    Anonymous

    Where can you still buy smokes at a pharmacy? Was found to be a conflict of interests in Ontario like 15 years ago.

  9. cenobyte Avatar
    cenobyte

    Ah, anywhere west of Ontario (or east of Ontario, I think), you can still buy cigarettes at Shopper’s Drug Mart.

i make squee noises when you tell me stuff.

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