My friend Smarty Pants once told me that the difference between an extrovert and an introvert isn’t so much how demonstrative you are with others, but in how you deal with being around others. An extrovert, Smarty Pants says, will thrive on and will draw energy from being around others. An introvert will thrive on and will draw energy from inside themself. In other words, an extrovert will draw that energy from *external* sources, and an introvert will draw that energy from *internal* sources.

Yours Truly has been told many times that she is a very extroverted person. But the truth of the matter is that while I enjoy being around others, it exhausts me sometimes. I need to ‘cocoon’ and just close myself off from the outside world. It’s how I recharge, I suppose. After speaking in public, or being at a shindig or at an event with lots of people, I need to shut down and stop.

It’s why I love early mornings; it’s why I love sunrises.

Sunrises are always new, they are the day’s birth. And like, in the moment of birth, when a child’s head first emerges into the light, when a woman and her child become two-from-one, dawn is the drawing forth of many-from-one. Every sunrise is a new breath, is a beginning. Every sunrise is a promise.

Sometimes, I think it can be a bit off-putting when there’s a houseful of people, and suddenly I just disappear. The truth of the matter is, sometimes I get overwhelmed with so many lovely voices, and I have to be alone. Sometimes I can totally recharge just by sitting on my own in a corner for a while, or by walking around the block, but sometimes I need to do something completely on my own (like baking scones, say).

So I just want to apologise to you if you think I’m ignoring you or if you think I don’t want you to visit. It’s just that I recharge in seclusion. Like monks.

cenobyte is a writer, editor, blogger, and super genius from Saskatchewan, Canada.


  1. I get it, I’m just going to sit at home by myself for the rest of the day.

    You were a fantastic host and very patient to put up with all of us rowdy people.

  2. I think I have two batteries in me, powering different characteristics. I need to hang out with people, sometimes, to energize myself and get myself going. I need to be by myself, sometimes, to power my stabilizers and brakes. I need periods of both.

    1. I think I just have the one battery, and if it gets a bit too low because I haven’t done the seclusion thing enough, Weird Things Happen.

      1. Ah, Bad Things Happen if either of my batteries get to low, so I keep trying the Balanced Approach. That’s not within my skill set, sadly.

  3. I totally understand this. I am largely a social person but there are times when being around too many people is just overstimulating and I need to be alone. Sometimes that even happens when it is just the four of us at home.

  4. I know exactly what you mean. I enjoy people’s company, and really like being around friends and family, but sometime I just need to get that breath of fresh air, that perfect silence that comes from within – and you don’t get that in a room full of people, no matter how much you love them and their company.

    Silence is golden for a lot of reasons. Never be sorry for taking care of your soul, those who love you totally understand.

  5. I’m with Des – thank you for putting us up, and putting up with us, and especially for the scones. And if there’s anything we can do to make it easier, let us know.

    I took the day off work today for no better reason than to be alone and do laundry, so I do understand.

  6. What it is like to go to a jail.

    If you are going to a jail you are most likely intoxicated.
    You will be stripped of things. Like a headband or a necklace.

    You will be placed in a cell. The cell is about 14x8x12. It is pretty roomy. There is a stainless steel toilet. You can drink from this and poop and pee in it. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt. There will be a small roll of paper provided. Everything is prety clean. Cops will come up to you and ask you questions. They are pretty accomodating i guess they want to solve ‘real crimes’ and don’t want you there at all.

    People will come and go. Thay are most likely intoxicated. Get ready for 8 hours of hollering and banging.

    You will sit or lay down. There is a slightly raised platform. This is covered with a clean rubber mat. A large quit is provided. Nothing covers anything and you are meant to feel bad.

    Get ready for boredom and regret.

i make squee noises when you tell me stuff.

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