centre of the universe

Category: Something or other but True

  • Provincial Cannabis Survey

    So according to a recent article in the local paper, “the majority of Saskatchewan residents” aren’t interested in trying marijuana once it becomes legal federally on 17 October. According to me, this is precisely how those surveys went: “Hi, we’re conducting a survey about marijuana…” “what’s that?” “When marijuana becomes legal, will you try it?” […]

  • The Inadvertent Feminist

    I have the most bizarre memory. I mean, I can remember things that happened when I was 2. I remember locker combinations from high school. I remember school seating plans from elementary school. Yet I can’t remember my kids’ names on a regular basis, or whether I’ve seen a particular movie. This is nothing new. […]

  • Frozone

    I have Seasonal Affective Disorder. I have, in the past, taken medications to deal with some of the symptoms. I have used light therapy (I had this great doctor who had therapeutic lamps in his office and I could just stop in a few times a week to read/study under them). I make sure to […]

  • Conversations at work

    “AH, Jig-A-Loo(TM), how I’ve missed you.” “It’s been a long time since you’ve addressed Jig-A-Loo(TM).” “Yes. The elliptical machine I use at the gym is starting to sound like a constipated elephant. Completely unrelated to my use of said machine, of course.” “Of course.” “It could probably use some Jig-A-Loo(TM), is what I’m saying.” “Understood. […]

  • Treat. Seriously. Treat.

    He organised his own Hallowe’en party – invited a few friends over this afternoon, and by the time they’d gone mumming, there were 20 kids and six parents in their group. They came home together, and I plied the parents with coffee and tea and then tried to breathe deeply as the children, ranging in […]

  • This may be the best thing I have ever written 

    I found this little gem on my Twitter feed via timehop. Part of me wishes it were fiction.                      It’s always an adventure when you’re me.  

  • Two Princes

    I leave the doctor’s office, where I have just been shirtless in front of two men I have never met. I’m feeling a little scared, because in meeting with this doctor, I have basically consented to surgery. Elective surgery, but elective surgery that may change my life and make it possible for me to run, […]

  • Storytelling Month – The Basement

    To celebrate Storytelling Month, I’m going to tell you at least one story per week in  February. These are all true stories. I don’t think I’ve ever told this story before. Maybe I have and I’ve just reached that stage of perpetual awesomeness where my memory of stories is like that thing that things get out […]

  • Same same?

    TL:DR version – learn your history before you shoot off at the mouth.

  • CRISIS! (Averted)

    I don’t know about you, but I still write letters to Santa every year. This year my letter, after the perfunctory inquiries about Mrs. Claus, the reindeer, and the state of Santa’s socks, included a request for the Clauses to look after my wee cousin as he undergoes some surgery. Usually the boys and I […]