to the tune of “Greensleeves”:
What guy is this who deigns to doze
upon my couch is resting
whom children greet with cheers and shrieks
and cats are plainly ignoring?
This, This is cenobyte’s Da,
whom cats ignore; the kids’ Papa.
This, this is cenobyte’s Da
upon the couch is sleeping.
to the tune of “God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen”
The cat is in the turkey
my husband’s in the rye!
Kids have been viewing kung fu shows
The tree’s lopsided; the sink’s a mess, and the laundry isn’t dry!
Oh-oh tie things like ribbon ’round my neck, ’round my neck! Oh-oh tie things like ribbons ’round my neck!
to the tune of “Silent Night”
Eggnog and rum, Cola and rum,
Seven and rum! Juice and rum!
Shots of whiskey; shots of rye.
shots of vodka and glasses of wine.
Sleep in hazy peace;
Sleep in drunken peace.
Merry Christmas everyone. I made some songs for you.