While boiling the laundry on the stovetop, one notices the mat in front of the counter is getting increasingly wet. One assumes one has been remiss in one’s transferring of washing to rinsing in the kitchen sink, and one becomes More Careful. Then one notices a Strange Sound. Like someone urinating on the floor. One checks one’s own bladder and finds it intact. Then one opens the under-sink cabinet.
“Oh!” One exclaims. “The drain is leaking!”
Upon closer examination, when one’s fingers crush the puny, rusted-out brass drainpipe, one issues forth a Barbaric Yawp, quickly followed by “STEAMPUNK BADASS!!”
One’s family gapes.
One rips the drain apart, finds one (1) spoon and one (1) knife lodged in trap. No diamond rings. Sad.
In the end, one needs new cabinetry (as this stuff is probably over 50 years old and not at all level. Or intact.), which one will procure as soon as one replaces drain with compression fitting and proper, non-rusting drainpipe.